Chocolate Pop Rocks Dinosaurs on the Small Screen

A 26″ shiny, black rectangle now rests in my apartment. Crisp, high-action, vibrantly colorful and deeply black images run across its slim, tapered surface. And there’s a DVD player. My first ever TV and DVD player. Jet pack here I come.

Going without either does not at all mean I never watched anything it was just all done on a 12″ notebook computer connected to the internet. Everyday I would come home from work, power up the computer while scrounging up dinner and then spend my evening watching TV. Now, I have viewing options. I’m never accomplishing anything ever again. Wah-hoo!

For some reason, TV gives me more lower-middle class guilt than any other pleasure. I partake in plenty of unnecessary amusements everyday without debating their worth. A vacation? Well, of course. Wine? No reason not to.  New car? Surely a necessity in an I can make it one if I try hard enough kind of way. But, somehow seeing a ragged man begging for money at the corner while driving to the electronic store to, once again, stare at the pretty row of televisions turns me into an apologetic rambling mess.

Though, it didn’t stop me. Possibly because I remember the first time I saw a plasma screen.

There is also a possibility that I bought this TV primarily to watch movies on a bigger screen. As a possible truth, an ideal movie was needed to break in this new unnecessary wonder — one of the ultimate ain’t-technology-great…or-is-it-movies — Jurassic Park.

I love this movie. It has everything — archaeologists, scientists, animals (or are they reptiles or birds), lots of action and a moral. I quote or am tempted to quote this movie a little too often. I try to hide this from people. Over and over again it was slipped into my D: drive for a guilty-pleasure night spent in a darkened room eating junk food and shivering with each Tyrannosaurus “rawwwwrrrr”.

TV and movies could be a conspiracy. An orchestrated alien government takeover designed around entertainment. Who knows what hidden images are flashing through our pixels? Those dinosaurs could really be saying “Watch more TV.”

Could a Mesozoish to English translation be possible with enough viewings? I am willing to take on this challenge. I am also willing to eat more chocolate Pop Rock dinosaurs.

“Why chocolate dinosaurs?” You might be asking. Why not make an homage to the movie — chilean sea bass, green jello, ice cream, steak tartare?” Because recreating the dinosaurs is the ultimate homage. Plus, while plastering on a petrified look and shaking my spoonful of green jello is fun, playing with chocolate and eating Pop Rocks is way funner.

The only thing that needs to be said about combining chocolate with Pop Rocks is that it’s like seeing a live dinosaur for the first time.

Caution: Eating these have been found to cause spontaneous roaring.

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